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EMOTIONAL DEPENDENCE AND NARCISSISM: RELATIONS WITH
SOCIAL BEHAVIORS AND GENDER INEQUALITY
Diana Araújo da Silva1
Abstract: This article explores the relationship between emotional dependence, narcissism, social
behaviors, and gender inequality. By reviewing the scientic literature, we examine how these
factors interrelate and impact social dynamics and individual experiences. Emotional dependence
and narcissism are addressed as psychological factors that inuence social behaviors and perpetuate
gender inequality.
Keywords: Emotional dependence, narcissism, society, patriarchy, and gender
1 Psychoanalyst | Researcher | Writer | Undergraduate in Psychology at Estácio
Introduction
Are emotional dependence and narcissism psychological aspects that signicantly affect
interpersonal relationships and social behaviors? Is gender inequality, in turn, a complex social
phenomenon that inuences and is inuenced by these psychological characteristics? These are
complex questions that this article aims to explore and observe, how emotional dependence and
narcissism relate to social behaviors and gender inequality.
Psychological aspects are topics widely studied and discussed in the scientic literature. This
literature review seeks to explore complex relationship dynamics and impact on mental health, which
affects the family and social life of individuals and society as a whole.
The methodology adopted for this study is a review of the scientic literature. Relevant
articles and studies published in academic and scientic journals over the years were selected. The
inclusion criteria were studies that directly and indirectly addressed the relationship between the
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factors presented.
Literature Review
Emotional dependence
Pathological bonding is characterized by an excessive need for support and validation from
others. Studies show that individuals with high emotional dependence tend to have low self-esteem
and difculty making independent decisions (Melero & Cantero, 2020).
According to Martínez López et al. (2016), “Emotional dependence is characterized by
addictive behaviors in love relationships, where the individual needs the other to maintain their
emotional balance” (p. 80). This behavior can be exacerbated in times of crisis, as observed during the
COVID-19 pandemic. According to Tomaz Paiva, T. et al. (2022), womens emotional dependence
during the pandemic showed a signicant increase due to social isolation and psychological abuse”
(p. 2257).
Santos and Camargo (2024) explore the factors and consequences of excessive attachment
in marital relationships, stating that “emotional dependence often results in a cycle of abuse and low
self-esteem, perpetuating psychological suffering” (p. e220002).
According to Bution et al (2016), excessive attachment characterized by addictive behaviors
in love relationships, the individual needs the other to maintain their emotional balance, therefore:
The denition of emotional dependence is an addictive disorder, in which the individual
needs the other to maintain their emotional balance.
The etiology is related to the development of attachment in childhood, as well as cultural
and phylogenetic factors.
Symptoms include compulsive behaviors, constant need for attention and affection, and
difculty maintaining healthy relationships.
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Indicated treatments include individual therapy, group therapy, support groups, and self-
help books
Emotional dependence can lead to submissive and conforming behaviors, perpetuating
gender inequality and narcissistic behaviors.
Narcissism
Narcissism, on the other hand, is marked by an inated sense of self-importance, a need for
admiration, and a lack of empathy. Narcissistic individuals may exhibit manipulative and exploitative
behaviors (Twenge & Campbell, 2009).
Thus, narcissism is another critical topic, deeply analyzed in the psychological literature.
Barbosa, Campos, and Neme (2021) observe that “modern narcissism is often associated with feelings
of helplessness and loneliness, resulting in supercial interpersonal relationships” (p. e190014).
Boracs (2010) adds that “self-esteem and identity in narcissism are fragilely constructed, constantly
depending on external validation” (p. 203).
Verde et al. (2022) highlight that female narcissism, although less obvious than male
narcissism, presents equally coercive and aggressive behaviors, especially in contexts of romantic
jealousy” (p. 2833-2864). This behavior is corroborated by Ponti, Ghinassi and Tani (2020), who
state: vulnerable and grandiose narcissism plays a mediating role in psychological abuse in couple
relationships” (p. 144-158).
The literature on narcissism is vast and addresses various aspects of this condition, from its
theoretical origins to its clinical and social manifestations. We will then see some important points:
Theoretical Origins - Freud and Narcissism. Sigmund Freud introduced the concept of
narcissism in psychoanalysis in his essay “On Narcissism (1914)1. He explored how narcissism
manifests itself in psychological development and personality formation.
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Clinical Manifestations - Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD): This disorder is
characterized by a grandiose behavior pattern, need for admiration, and lack of empathy. The literature
addresses neurobiological factors, diagnosis and treatment of NPD.
Interpersonal relationships are profoundly affected by narcissism. Narcissistic individuals
tend to utilize others as mirrors for their own emotional needs, leading to supercial and utilitarian
interactions. Reduced empathy and a lack of genuine connection make it difcult to build long-lasting,
meaningful relationships.
There are several literature reviews that explore the different aspects of narcissism, including
its clinical and social implications.
Social Behavior
“Narcissism and helplessness: some considerations on interpersonal relationships today”.
This article, published in the journal Psicologia USP, discusses how narcissism manifests itself in
contemporary interpersonal relationships, highlighting helplessness and lack of social support as
factors that contribute to the emergence of narcissistic behaviors.
The article addresses in detail the implications of narcissism in modern social interactions.
The text discusses how narcissism, characterized by an inated self-image and a constant need for
admiration, has deep roots in experiences of helplessness and lack of social support.
Helplessness, according to the article, is a critical factor that contributes to the development
of narcissism. When individuals do not nd the necessary emotional support during their formation,
they may develop narcissistic behaviors as defense mechanisms. The incessant search for external
validation, the fear of rejection, and the difculty in forming affective bonds are some of the
consequences of this emotional helplessness.
Social Behaviors are inuenced by psychological and contextual factors. Studies indicate that
emotional dependence and narcissism can negatively affect the quality of interpersonal relationships,
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increasing the prevalence of conicts and abusive behaviors (Lambert et al., 2014).
In this way, emotional dependence can lead to self-censorship and sacricial behaviors,
while narcissism can result in dominance and control in relationships, which can favor stereotypical
gender inequality.
Gender Inequality
Gender inequality is a persistent problem in many societies. It is underpinned by gender
stereotypes, social norms, and structural inequalities (Connell, 2005).
The literature on emotional dependence and narcissism in relation to gender inequality
addresses how these factors interact with and reinforce existing inequalities.
In Emotional Dependence, studies indicate that emotional dependence is more prevalent
among women, often resulting in feelings of guilt, fear of abandonment, emotional emptiness,
anxiety, and depression. Narcissism, characterized by an inated self-image and a constant need for
admiration, can negatively affect interpersonal relationships and contribute to gender inequality. Men
with narcissistic characteristics may seek positions of power and control, while narcissistic women
may face difculties in recognizing and facing their own needs for validation.
Impact on Gender Inequality
Power Relations: Narcissism can create unequal power dynamics in interpersonal
relationships, where one partner constantly seeks validation and control, while the other
is subjugated or marginalized.
Patriarchal Culture: Society often reinforces narcissistic behaviors, especially in men,
promoting the idea that domination and control are signs of strength and success.
Domestic Violence: Emotional dependence can lead to a woman remaining in abusive
relationships, contributing to the maintenance of the cycle of domestic violence.
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Emotional dependence and narcissism can reinforce these stereotypes by perpetuating
behaviors and attitudes that keep women in menial positions and men in positions of power.
Studies often address the intersection between emotional dependence and narcissism,
exploring how these dynamics interact in relationships. Talbot et al. (2015) state that “the dimensions
of narcissism and self-esteem are signicant predictors of aggression in intimate partner violence(p.
193-196).
Rinker (2009) notes that “perpetrators of intimate partner violence often exhibit narcissistic
traits, utilizing the victims emotional dependence as a form of control and manipulation” (p. 417).
Certainly, studies on emotional dependence and narcissism are applicable to all interpersonal
relationships, regardless of gender, gender identity, or type of relationship (whether heterosexual,
homosexual, bisexual, etc.). The power dynamics, external validation, and behavioral patterns that
underpin narcissism and emotional dependence can arise in any type of relationship:
MARTÍNEZ-LÓPEZ et al., 2016: “Emotional dependence can be observed in a variety of
interpersonal relationships, not limited to a specic type of gender or sexual orientation.
TOMAZ PAIVA et al., 2022: “During the COVID-19 pandemic, emotional dependence
was present in relationships of different natures and congurations, including heterosexual and
homosexual couples.
Barbosa, Campos & Neme, 2021: “The characteristics of narcissism manifest themselves in
a similar way in different types of relationships, regardless of the sexual orientation or gender identity
of those involved.
Boracs, 2010: Narcissism can be perceived in a wide range of interpersonal contexts,
reecting similar dynamics of seeking validation and domination.
“Narcissism and helplessness: some considerations about interpersonal relationships today”
This article, published in the journal Psicologia USP, discusses how narcissism manifests itself in
contemporary interpersonal relationships, highlighting helplessness and lack of social support as
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factors that contribute to the emergence of narcissistic behaviors.
“Narcissism: self-esteem, identity, otherness” - This book by Luis Horstein, published in the
Brazilian Journal of Psychiatry, delves into the issues surrounding narcissistic pathologies and limit
states, addressing the metapsychology, theory and clinic of these issues.
“Why Narcissism Is Less Obvious in Women Than in MenThis BBC article explores
how narcissism manifests differently in females, revealing that narcissistic women can be just as
dangerous and violent as their male counterparts.
These articles provide a comprehensive overview of narcissism in women and its implications
for interpersonal relationships and mental health.
Literary studies reinforce the validity of research on emotional dependence and narcissism
for all forms of interpersonal relationships, highlighting the universality of these human dynamics.
Discussion
The dynamics of psychological codependency, in power relations between individuals,
brings several factors that favor the maintenance of emotional dependence and create a vicious cycle
of submission and conformity, where individuals, especially women, may feel compelled to accept
subservient roles and favor behaviors that perpetuate gender inequality. This behavior can be reinforced
by cultural and social norms that value obedience, hierarchy, and conformity in relationships, leading
to the perpetuation of patterns of inferiority, inequality, and personal and social oppression.
There are several ways to describe and perceive Emotional Dependence: Excessive
Attachment; pathological link; Need for Constant Trial; Discontent in the Absence of the Other;
Personal Annulment. This dependence can lead to permanence in abusive relationships, perpetuating
the cycle of violence, leading the individual to submission, low self-esteem, fear of abandonment,
control, isolation, insecurity, longing for affection, emotional despair, imbalance, personal sacrice
and neediness.
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Emotional dependence and narcissism have a signicant impact on social behaviors and the
perpetuation of gender inequality. Excessive attachment can lead to submission and acceptance of
traditional gender roles, while narcissism can reinforce dominant and authoritarian attitudes. Both
factors contribute to the maintenance of unequal social structures.
For a narcissistic man, a marriage to an emotionally dependent woman may seem ideal, as
he can exert control and get the constant validation he wants. However, this dynamic is extremely
harmful to the woman, who may feel trapped, devalued, and emotionally drained.
When the situation is reversed, where a narcissistic woman is married to an emotionally
dependent man, the scenario can be equally damaging, but with different dynamics. The man may
feel constantly inadequate and looking for approval, while the woman utilizes her need for validation
to maintain control.
Impacts on the emotionally dependent man
Self-esteem: It can suffer signicant wear and tear, as it is constantly looking for approval
that is never enough.
Isolation: May feel isolated and emotionally dependent, afraid of losing the relationship.
Mental Health: The combination of emotional dependence and narcissism can lead to
high levels of anxiety, depression, and other mental health issues.
Impacts on Narcissistic Women
Narcissism Reinforcement: The dynamic can reinforce narcissistic behaviors, as it nds
in the dependent partner the constant validation it wants.
Relational Challenges: May have difculty maintaining healthy and balanced relationships,
perpetuating a cycle of control and manipulation.
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Impacts on the couples relationship
Power Inequality: The relationship will be marked by an inequality of power, where the
woman dominates emotionally, while the man submits.
Cycle of Abuse: There can be a cycle of emotional abuse, where the man feels trapped
and unable to get out of the relationship.
These harmful dynamics perpetuate gender inequality, regardless of who is in the narcissistic
role.
There are several scientic articles that address narcissism in women. The term narcissism
can conjure up images of arrogant and self-absorbed men. This personality trait—with its hallmarks
of ostentatious grandiosity, assertiveness, and superiority—is indeed more often observed in males,
but it has more to do with culture than with aspects of personality itself. This is because these core
characteristics are very much in line with traditional masculine traits. In fact, up to 75% of people
diagnosed with narcissistic personality disorder are men. (Green et al, 2024)
We can classify the causes of narcissism and emotional dependence into primary, secondary,
and subsequent: Primary Causes
Narcissism:
Genetics: Hereditary traits that can predispose an individual to developing narcissistic
traits.
Environment: Childhood experiences, such as excessive dedication or excessive criticism
from caregivers.
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Emotional Dependence:
Attachment Development: Unstructured or insufcient attachment relationships in
childhood can lead to emotional dependence in adulthood.
Cultural Factors: Cultural norms that promote emotional dependence, such as the idea
that happiness depends on a partner. Secondary Causes
Narcissism:
Traumatic Experiences: Traumas in childhood or adulthood that lead to a strengthening
of narcissistic defense mechanisms.
Lack of Empathy: Development of inappropriate emotional skills, leading to an inated
self-image and need for external validation.
Emotional Dependence:
Dysfunctional Relationships: Dysfunctional interpersonal relationships that reinforce
emotional dependence, such as abusive or codependent relationships.
Low Self-Esteem: Feelings of inadequacy and low self-esteem that lead to a constant
search for approval and validation. Subsequent Causes
Narcissism:
Manipulative Behaviors: Development of manipulative and controlling behaviors as a
result of the need for constant validation.
Toxic Interpersonal Relationships: Formation of toxic and unbalanced relationships that
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perpetuate narcissism.
Emotional Dependence:
Cycle of Abuse: Permanence in abusive relationships that perpetuate the cycle of
emotional dependence and domestic violence.
Mental Health Problems: Development of mental health problems, such as anxiety,
depression, and other disorders related to emotional dependence.
These classications help to better understand the causes and consequences of narcissism and
emotional dependence, making it easier to identify points of intervention for treatment and prevention.
The codependency dynamic between a narcissist and an emotional addict can have signicant
impacts on living and behavior in society. Let’s look at some ways in which this dynamic manifests
itself and affects the social environment:
Impact on Social Coexistence
Toxic Relationships: These dynamics often result in toxic relationships, where the narcissist
exerts control and manipulation, while the emotional addict seeks constant validation
and approval. This can create an unbalanced and dysfunctional social environment.
Social Isolation: The emotional dependent person may isolate himself socially, focusing
exclusively on pleasing the narcissist. This can lead to the loss of other important social
relationships and emotional isolation.
Interaction Difculties: The narcissist may exhibit arrogant and dismissive behaviors
with others, while the emotionally dependent may show submission and conformity,
making healthy and balanced interactions difcult.
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Behavior in Society
Maintaining Gender Stereotypes: The dynamic can reinforce traditional gender
stereotypes, perpetuating the idea that men should be dominant and women submissive.
Perpetuation of Inequality: These relationships reinforce and perpetuate inequalities, not
only within the relationship, but also in broader societal perceptions about gender roles
and power.
Inuence on Social Norms: Manipulative and controlling behaviors can be normalized,
affecting the way other people perceive and behave in their own relationships.
Effects on Mental Health and Well-Being
Anxiety and Depression: Both individuals can suffer from mental health issues. The
emotional dependent may develop anxiety and depression due to the constant search for
approval and fear of abandonment, while the narcissist may face issues of self-esteem
and insecurity disguised by condent outward behavior.
Community Resilience: The presence of these dynamics in a community can weaken
social resilience, making it difcult to form support and cooperation networks.
Possible Interventions and Solutions
Education and Awareness: Promoting awareness of the harms of these dynamics can help
prevent their occurrence and encourage the search for healthier relationships.
Psychological Support: Individual and couple therapies can help both partners understand
and resolve their emotional issues, promoting a more balanced dynamic.
Changing Social Norms: Working to change the social and cultural norms that perpetuate
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these dynamics, promoting gender equality and mutual respect.
We have seen that these codependency dynamics not only affect the individuals directly
involved, but also have broader repercussions on society. Addressing these issues is key to promoting
healthy relationships and a more just and equitable society.
This type of relationship perpetuates gender inequality and can lead to a cycle of emotional
and psychological abuse. It is important to recognize these patterns and seek help to create healthier
and more balanced relationships, in the family nucleus and in society as a whole, thus creating a
healthier socio-family environment where general well-being can become a social reality.
Addictive behaviors and the constant search for external validation result in cycles of
abuse and suffering, exacerbated by crisis situations. Understanding these dynamics is crucial for
developing effective interventions and promoting mental health and well-being in both social and
family relationships.
All these points addressed in this discussion and in the article in general, show how emotional
dependence and narcissism can contribute to the perpetuation of gender inequality, affecting both
interpersonal dynamics and broader social structures.
Conclusion
This article explored various facets of emotional dependence, narcissism, and gender
inequality, revealing the complex interactions between these conditions and how they shape behavior
and social dynamics.
We have observed that emotional dependence often arises from inappropriate attachment
relationships in childhood and is reinforced by cultural norms that promote submission. On the other
hand, narcissism can develop from an excess of criticism or adulation in childhood and manifests
itself in behaviors of constant search for validation and control. The combination of these two states
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in a relationship, whether a narcissistic man with a dependent woman or vice versa, perpetuates an
unbalanced and harmful power dynamic for living in society.
Pathological attachment and narcissism reinforce traditional gender stereotypes, where one
partner dominates and the other submits. This dynamic not only perpetuates gender inequality within
relationships, but also inuences the way society views and accepts gender roles.
Patriarchal culture and social norms often reinforce and celebrate narcissistic behaviors,
especially among men, further exacerbating inequality and consequently specic violence.
In this way, it is possible to reect that to promote gender equality, it is essential to
deconstruct patterns of emotional dependence and narcissism that the culture of patriarchy insists
on maintaining. Education, awareness, and psychological support play key roles in this process.
Therapeutic interventions that promote self-knowledge, empathy, and healthy communication can
help create more balanced relationships.
Finally, we discuss how these dynamics impact social interaction and perpetuate dysfunctional
behaviors that affect mental health and social cohesion. Addressing these issues is crucial to building
a fairer and more resilient society. The importance of recognizing and addressing the interactions
between emotional dependency, narcissism, and gender inequality to promote more equal, healthy
relationships, and a more equitable society.
The reviewed articles highlight the role of society and culture in the perpetuation of
narcissism. In an era marked by individualism and the relentless search for recognition, narcissistic
behaviors are often reinforced and celebrated. Social networks and digital media contribute to the
exaltation of an idealized self-image, exacerbating the problem.
The implications for therapy are clear, it is essential to address helplessness and lack of
emotional support in the treatment of narcissism. Therapeutic interventions should focus on developing
empathy, forming healthy affective bonds, and in the construction of a more realistic and balanced
self-image.
Psychoanalytic studies continue to investigate the dynamics of narcissism and its impact on
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personality development and interpersonal relationships.
Literature suggests that narcissism can exacerbate gender inequality by reinforcing harmful
gender stereotypes and norms.
Finally, the article highlighted the complex interrelationship between emotional dependence,
narcissism, social behaviors, and gender inequality. Reinforcing that understanding these relationships
is crucial for the development of interventions that promote gender equality and improve psychological
and social health. Future studies should continue to explore these dynamics and seek effective
strategies to mitigate the negative impacts of these factors.
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